It is Sunday. I love Sunday evenings because it is the time I get my Son back from his mother. She takes him on the weekends and although I do enjoy that break I miss him terribly. Sunday evenings are great because after a long weekend of not having him our time seems just a little more special. Tonight I picked him up and before we went home we made a stop at the grocery store. This is a normal routine for us on Sunday's because I usually take him with to help pick out stuff for lunch and dinner for the week ahead. He likes it because he knows on Sunday evenings he will get a balloon from the store as well.
Tonight we decided to bake some cookies after dinner. Not from scratch. I don't know how to do that. Apparently I don't know how to bake them in the easiest pre-made form as well. These were just toll house cookie cubes you broke, put on a sheet and baked. Both attempts resulted in burned cookies on the bottom and soft goo on top. I followed the directions perfectly too! Oh well, Miles has put down about 5 cookies so far and hasn't complained. He rarely complains anyways. He is pretty much the most happy go lucky baby I have ever seen. I'm not just saying that either, he really is.
The weekends tend to get lonely for me so I really try to keep myself busy. This weekend I managed to get some Christmas shopping done. I found some really great things for Miles and I'm really excited for him to open them. I also went to The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug with a couple friends today. The movie was OK, but time out with buddies was great. I have also been spending time with an old friend on a more than friends basis. This has been a difficult challenge for me for a few reasons. The biggest reason I'm finding it a challenge is that there is this idea in my head that it's too soon. Or that it is disrespectful to my ex-wife. I guess I can't call her my ex-wife yet because we are not officially divorced. It's been 2 months and for that reason it seems too soon? Or is it? I feel OK with it when I'm with her. I mean, I feel happy when I'm with her and that should count right? I don't know...
The truth is, when I don't have my Son I'm a complete disaster. I mean, it's winter in Montana right now. So just going for a walk or a hike is not an option. I can only go to Starbucks so many times too. And I spend so much time at the shop during the week that going there on the weekends just to be there seems silly too. Bar scene is not an option for me. I just don't feel comfortable in or around them. So I guess I resort to playing guitar in my apartment. Which is fun for a bit but then it too becomes boring. So I have been spending a lot of time with her. Which I like. We do things like cook dinner, watch movies, play games. We talk. It's great. I was open with my ex about this and she was angry and upset. She told me it was embarrassing to her. I guess I feel like, she is the one that wanted this. And without going into too many details, was her choice to end it. Since ending it, has made it more than clear that it was final and no going back. So in my mind, if you are that absolute about something. How can you say what the other person is to do or not do in their personal life anymore? So starting about Wednesday or Thursday last week I made the decision she doesn't get to. Since being ok with that in my head, the time I spent with this 'friend' was fantastic.
OK, it's time to snuggle with my little man and eat what burned cookies are left. Until next time!
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